Tell Your Friends.....

New internet forums (messageboard) section on the AlltheInterweb Blog, with a variety of subjects to yabber about on the Interweb.
Intended to take over from a number of other older forums I created previously, and merge them together in a singular location.

ForumMain Category: Fun & GamesJokes ForumRude Jokes

Please or Register to create posts and topics.

Rude Jokes

#1 · March 29, 2020, 9:50 pm

Bit of the forum for posting jokes that can be categorised as "rude" / "dirty", such as this one for starters:

Just had my registration to an online dating website, one of the questions was, "what do you like in a woman" .....apparently "My dick" is not an acceptable answer

#2 · March 29, 2020, 9:51 pm

A local chicken farmer is hiring staff for Christmas at £9.50/hour. I told them about your experience handling small cocks. You start on Monday.

#3 · March 29, 2020, 9:51 pm

Why can’t a blonde girl count up to 70?
Because 69's a bit of a mouthful.

#4 · March 29, 2020, 9:52 pm

Why did the Avon lady walk funny?
Her lipstick

#5 · March 29, 2020, 9:56 pm

The seven dwarves went to see the pope.
Doc asks the pope"Are there any dwarf nuns in the Vatican?"
"No"replies the Pope.
"well are there any dwarf nuns in Europe then?"Asks sneezy
"No"replies the Pope
"well are there any dwarf nuns in the world?"asks grumpy
"No"says the Pope,"there are NO dwarf nuns!"
The dwarves start to snig.ger and chant......
"DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN! DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!"

#6 · March 29, 2020, 9:58 pm

One day a little girl was watching the Discovery Channel, and saw two monkeys having sex.
The little girl had no clue what the two monkeys were doing. So the little girl went up to her Mom and said,
"Mommy, Mommy what are the Monkeys doing?"
"Oh, they are just baking a cake," replied her Mom.

The little girl continued watching the Discovery Channel, and then saw two Wolves having sex. She had forgotten what her Mother said they were doing. So the little girl went and asked her Dad.
"Daddy, Daddy what are the wolves doing?" said the little girl. "They are just baking a cake," said her Father.

So the next day the little girl ran screaming to her Mom and Dad and said "Oh Mommy, Daddy I know that you guys were baking last night. I know this because I licked the frosting off the couch."

#7 · March 29, 2020, 9:58 pm

Once a gorgeous woman walked into the doctors office and took a seat on the table.
The doctor took one look at her and threw all professionalism out the window.
He asked her to undress and lay down on the table. She did so and he begins to stroke her thigh.
"Do you know what I'm doing?"
She replies "Yes, you are checking for any strange bumps".
"Very good he says".
He then begins to fondle her breasts and again said "do you know what I'm doing?" and she replies "Yes, you are checking for any abnormalities that may form into cancers."
"Very good" he said, then he pulled down his pants and began to have intercourse with the lady.
He then said "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yes, you're getting herpes".

#8 · March 29, 2020, 9:59 pm

This man came home from work and found his little girl crying in the driveway. So he says "whats wrong honey". She says "daddy, we about lost mommy today". She said "I walked in the bedroom and there was mommy laying on the bed screaming Oh Lord I'm cummin...Oh Lord I'm cummin". She said "daddy, if it hadn't been for the mailman on top of her holding her down, I believe we would have lost her!!!!"

#9 · March 29, 2020, 10:00 pm

Snow white inherits the magic mirror from her step mother the evil queen. So she says to the mirror MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL MAKE MY BOOBS THE BIGGEST OF ALL. So sure enough her breasts go massive. She tells the prince and he goes up to the mirror and says "Mirror mirror on the wall, make my penis touch the floor", and then in a flash of light - HIS LEGS DROP OFF.